Chaos and Recovery

The above 2 words really do a wonderful job of describing the time since my last posting, which was a long ass time ago unfortunately. I was caught up in the last weeks of summer and the first couple weeks of my junior year of college, as I type I sit with numerous pages of reading on my desk that are yet to be scanned. I say chaos and recovery because if you have ever moved into a college room/suite/dorm/townhouse, you know how it goes. Add to this the fact that I am living with 5 other guys, all of whom are awesome, but all of whom, myself included, don't havea fucking idea how to decorate an appartment. So...it's been two weeks and our common room's decorative scheme could be called "Beer, Chicks, and Stolen Shit. Our most recent addition to the place is a ten foot, metal sign displaying my school's name and catch phrase. It was discovered in the woods behind the baseball field, and I almost cried with happiness when I finally saw it hung up, partially because I have no idea how it's still hanging up there, and partially because I had the shitty feeling in general that comes from staying up until 3 in the morning drinking and repeatedly riding a slip and slide while portraying different sexual positions with my best friend...Whatever, I'm in college, it's ok to do things like this until I graduate, then I have to be proper...shit.
Anyway, first weeks of junior year, loving life, starting to see what it is like for people who didn't play sports in school, because I am currently enjoying my first school semester ever without playing a sport. It' so insane that all I have to do is schoolwork...that's it...no meetings, no captain's practices, no regular practices, no NCAA forms, no lifting tests (although I still work out every day with my friend, who is so jacked that he discovers new veins on a daily basis),no bullshit from the coaches, I have to say it's pretty damn awesome. Living with 5 other guys has got to be the best experience ever, there is always something to do, a beer pong table is permanently erected, Mario Kart battles rage daily, and in general we have an awesome time, I couldn't ask for a better living situation.
I need to go do homework. Just in case your curious as to what I am reading, which your probly not but fuck it it's my blog haha, I am reading an excerpt from "The Things They Carried" by Tim O' Brien and will later be reading "Hard Times" by Dickens. I know right, don't get too excited..Until I post again, have a wonderful September and live it up.

The Truth

Wanna know something that NEVER works...those god damn magnets on shower curtains...

Tropic Thunder: Alot of Thunder, Not Enough Laughter

So I did end up seeing Tropic Thunder last night with a few friends. And to start off, I will say that there are some pretty awful portrayals of mentally retarded people by Ben Stiller's character. It definitely pushed the envelope of what is appropriate for a mainstream Hollywood movie. However, once you get beyond the general shock of what is being portrayed and notice Stiller's ridiculous "Simple Jack" makeup, it was pretty hillarious. But that brings up what I thought the problem was with the movie itself. At 110 minutes it is a little longer than most movies, and I felt that the balance of comedy to action just wasn't in order. I would definitely agree that there are some very very funny parts, I was laughing alot, especially in the opening trailer for "Booty Sweat" and Bust a Nut Bars". I think that I laughed harder during that than the whole movie itself. But I would sum up my grievance with Tropic Thunder by saying that when I laughed I laughed hard, but when I wasn't laughing I was waiting for something funny to happen, and sometimes I felt I had to wait too long to laugh again. Props to the actors for bringing out the best in their characters, Robert Downey Jr. as Kirk Lazarus was hillarious and Ben Stiller and Jack Black were also standouts in their comedic performances. In all Tropic Thunder was good; not great, but good. A bit long winded and although the action was intense and the humor strong, as a theatrical diner I was expecting comedy with a dash of action, not the other way around.

Day 2

Day 2 of this new blogging business, I made some changes in color and such, and also added a super in your face picture of my semi retarded golden retriever Sport. She's got a good heart, but she sleeps 18 hours a day and considers chasing a tennis ball once and then taking a dump on the lawn a hard day's work. Regardless, until I find another picture she will be the one staring through you as you open my page.
Also, in case you were unaware, the word retard is currently making quite a stir in the media. Apparently, uptight activists with nothing better to do have boycotted the movie Tropic Thunder, which I fully intend on seeing tonight, because of Ben Stiller's constant use of the "r" word. In the world of the "n" word and the "c" word, the "r" word ranks in importance somewhere around dirty toilet paper and Flavor Flav's SAT scores. I mean come on, retard!? It's not that bad! Ok, so it was originally used to refer to mentally challenged people, and I understand that that is not a polite referral. But I think that the word retard has developed and molded into something completely different. It simply refers to the fact that every single person on this planet has, at some time, acted completely idiotic, warrenting jeers and cruel jokes at their expense. For exibit A I will give an example of my own personal idiotic behavior. Flashback fall semester 2007, I am a sophomore at an awesome college in Maryland. On a Saturday night I go out to a "highlighter party" (no I'm not 21, yes I drink...sue me). The idea is that you wear a white tshirt to the party where there are blacklights set up. Highlighters are provided and you commence to drink and socialize while being drawn on by your friends and it looks cool in the blacklights. After a good deal of this, I go to bed and ride out my hangover watching football all day Sunday. The following Thursday I have an 8am class which I don't deem terribly important, so I go out Wednesday night and drink. I end up setting my alarm for PM instead of AM, which I feel I can safely say happens to a good deal of people. I woke up at 7:58 for my 8 o'clock class across campus. I throw on a tshirt and go to class and sit in the front row. Throughout the first half of class I was really confused, my professor kept staring at me and I was thrown off. I knew I looked like shit, but I don't think I invited stares. So at break I talk to a friend and mention the stares. He just looks at me and shakes his head, and what ensued was what I would call a lightbulb moment (DING). I realized that in my rush to get to clas on time, of course, I grabbed the shirt from the highlighter party. This means that I now have neon pink boobs on my chest and the proud declaration of "I Love Cock" written on my back. I would call that a retarded move, and this doesn't mean that I think mentally challenged people would wear a shirt with boobs and a penis loving slogan on the back of it in public, it just means that I acted like an idiot, and what more can you do than laugh? I definitely did. The point is that in a world of offensive words, the word retard is not worth making a fuss about...do these people really think that because they boycott the 3,478th movie to ever use the word, that the general public is going to suddenly go "Holy shit, retard really is a bad word! I'm not going to say it ever again!" No...so they should stop making a stir and worry more about the things that matter in life. I will let you know how Tropic Thunder is, I'm pretty sure it will make me laugh, politically incorrect jargon or not. I'm going to go enjoy the day...take care.

The Beginning..siiiiiick

So on a whim I started a blog, not sure why, but it looks fun and every now and then there's stuff that comes up in my experiences and in my thoughts that I am selfish enough to think should be shared with the world haha...ipso facto...blog. That being said, I am not really sure when I will post, but i am guessing every 5 or 7 days there will be larger stories and in between shorter bits of random thought.
A few things to understand about me: I have a dry/sarcastic/rude sense of humor. So this means every now and then I will curse and/or have other vulgar language...fuck...ass... Also, I am an english major, but perfect grammar is clearly far beyond my current reach. I am super relaxed, and sympathetic and emotional would probably be the worst words that could be used to describe me. I am easy going and find humor in most of life's everyday experiences, and this humor will be gladly shared. I'm going to go eat steak...take it easy, I will post again soon...